DC Trip

Yesterday was such a beautiful day, Chris and I decided to go to DC. We both love going to the museums, but since it was so nice we decided to walk around to the memorials and monument instead. We started out at the Washington Monument. This is where Pakistan Day is usually held. I thought this picture was really cool.

My favorite is the Jefferson Memorial. I guess I like it because you can sit on the steps and look out at the water. Its very peaceful and serene.

Ive always been creeped out by Lincoln's Memorial. I dont know why. Actually, I suppose it could be because one time during a seance my friend conjured up his spirit and it walked into her and she began talking like him, really deep voice and all. Weird, na? It was a longggggg time ago, believe me. We actually did the ouija board thing too and contacted this one little boy named Matthew who died in Pan Am's Flight 103. All I remember is someone saying that he had an evil twin and instead of contacting the good kid, we got the bad kid instead. WEIRDER, na? All I remember is he was really angry. No kidding?

Ok so getting back to Lincoln, I believe his memorial to be haunted.

Walking back from the Jefferson Memorial we noticed the Holocaust Museum and decided to go. Chris and I have had a few emotionally turbo-charged weeks and even though we were slightly upset/depressed we still decided to go to the museum of horror. Apparently you need to get tickets for the museum before 10am, so we didnt get to see the whole thing, just a few displays but even that was enough. I remember going there in 10th grade and having seen the whole thing I was not ready to do it all again. We left in silence, and after a few minutes we spoke and the first thing Chris said was, "We're so lucky to be alive. Our "pains" of everyday life dont compare at all to what people have lived through or died for."

...my thoughts exactly.

Someone cut this cake already!

Last Sunday I was at a bridal shower for a friend from work. It was a really nice day, really nice party, I won a door prize, cake was amazingly good. But it happened: this nagging feeling that I tried to smother kept creeping back, so strong at one point I thought I was suffocating, unable to breathe, almost running out of the house straight to my car and all the way home.

What happened? I dont know. I let my mind wander a bit too much. It started by me looking at the bride, sitting amongst her family and friends opening presents, and I wanted to be her. I started thinking of my bridal shower and how I wanted it to be just like that. And I couldn't wait to be so happy (mA the bride was beaming and looked so happy, and content. She's been through so much she truly deserves to be happy and I wish her all the best iA.). There was an 18mon old at my feet and I picked him up and was playing with him and then my mind wandered, again, to children. I know Im not married, and I shouldnt even be thinking like this, but I want tons of children iA. He was such a cute baby (ok i think all babies are cute but still...). In five minutes I went from single and loving it to my bridal shower and married with three children. Yeah, it was exhausting.

I always hear ppl say, "She must have done something good in her life to be so happy now." And it makes me think of all the things Ive done. Ive always looked out for other ppl's interests, never been selfish, always put my feelings aside and given everyone an equal chance. It has always ended up biting me in the ass. It has, but still I havent changed my ways. So what havent I done to not be worthy of happiness now?

On the way home I called my mom and I ended up telling her about wanting to be the bride opening presents etc. She said, (and i love her for this!) "Beta, that just sounds like a birthday girl opening presents."

...hmm? yeah i guess so. She said since I didnt get to spend my birthday with family last year bc I moved up all by myself that day that the next time they visit they'll bring presents and celebrate my birthday.

The moral of this story? Stop longing for what you dont have and enjoy what you do have. Im not a bride to be, Im not a fiancee. Im just a girl who enjoys birthdays, family, presents and CAKE!

Cytology Anthem

Well you filled up my head,
With so many lies.
Twisted my heart
Til something snapped inside.
I'd like to give it one more try
but my give a damn's busted.

You can crawl back home, say you were wrong,
stand out in the yard and cry all night long.
Go ahead and water my lawn.
My give a damn's busted.

I really wanna care,
I wanna feel somethin'
Let me dig a little deeper... ..... ...
Nope...Sorry...Nothin'

You can say you've got issues.
You can say you're a victim.
It's all your parents fault,
After all you didn't pick em
Well maybe Oprah's got time to listen.
My give a damn's busted.

(*Well let me get this straight now)
Your therapist said
It was all just a phase
A product of the prozac
And your co-dependent ways
So uhh ... who's your enabler these days
My give a damn's busted.

I really wanna care,
I wanna feel somethin'
Let me dig a little deeper...
Unh unh

(Oh you're tellin' me)
It's a desperate situation,
No tellin' what you'll do.
If I don't forgive you,
You say your life is through.
C'mon... give me somethin' I can use.
(My give a damn's busted.)

(*Ahh you knew I was gonna say that, didn't ya.)
My give a damn's busted
My give a damn's busted
Honey trust me
My give a damn's busted yeahhh ...
OOOH
My give a damn's busted yeahhh
-Jo Dee Messina

9.21.05

I dont know what made me want to recount this story, but here it is...

9.20 8AM- Day 2 of my new job, new career, new apartment, new life. All moved in, finances all squared away. Yay me! Dunkin Donuts coffee to celebrate!!!
11am - It starts. This dull pain just below my diaphragm. Im thinking its heart burn, which is funny because I've never had it before but I imagined it to feel a lot like what I was feeling.
2pm - Hospital Pharmacy. Pain so bad, I'm pulling just about everything off the shelves. I buy something that claims to relieve indegestion and heart burn. (Not to be confused with the pink stuff)
3pm - Relief. The pain is gone. Excellent.
5:45pm - The pain is back, bad enough to make me lose my apeptite. (For folks who do not know me: this is unprecedented. Ive never lost my apetite, like ever! I come back from autopsies asking who wants lunch!)

9pm - Alone in my apartment. Trying to ignore the pain. Its nothing, really. Im overreacting. Right?

10:45pm - Im in the Weis parking lot chugging down the pink stuff.

11pm - 911 Emergency: 'Yeah, hi. I don't think this is an emergency. I am in a lot of pain but I wanted to go over my symptoms with a nurse for evaluation of whether or not I need to go to the hospital.' (I hear myself say it and laugh in my head. Hi my name is Farah and my favorite color is clear...) She listens to me talk for all of fifteen minutes about my pain, where it is, when it started, etc. Finally she says, "You're alone. What could it hurt to go get it checked out? Do you want me to send an ambulance?" For indigestion? Are you nuts? No, I work at the hospital. I'll drive.

In the ER there were a ton of people, some of who had probably been there for two days. I went through an initial eval, then was released to go back and wait in the waiting room. At this point it was after 12am 9.21.05. My pain became so severe that I could not stand to wait any longer. I marched up to the window and told the lady behind the desk, "I need to be seen NOW and if you make me wait any longer this thing is going to rupture and you're going to be in BIG TROUBLE!

Honestly, I dont know why I was threatening her and more importantly I dont know where the idea of something inside of me rupturing came from but it worked.

2am-ish: CT scans to be done. Must drink white, chalky, milk of magnesium looking stuff. Nurse: Oh, its berry flavored. (Yayy me??!) She tells me to drink it fast. "Just Chug It!" So I do. And it goes down quick... OH MY GOSH! OH MY GOSH! .. then it all comes back up just as fast.

2:30am: Berry Flavored Shake: Take Two. I think I'll sip it slowly this time.

I have to wait 30 minutes or so then get taken to get CT scanned.

3:40am: BAD NEWS. Its my appendix, as the doc suspected. Its infected and inflammed beyond belief. Its got to come out. My first thoughts: "Um, yeah thats great. I'll think about it. But thank you. (If I go straight home I can still get in some sleep time to make it to work on time.)

Doc: No, you don't understand. I cannot let you leave. You have to have surgery. Call someone to come pick you up. (in how many pieces?)

My worst nightmare come true. The dreaded phone call. I could not muster up the courage to call my parents and tell them so I called my khala instead. Im having emergency surgery. Tell Ma I love her.

So I was prepped for surgery at 4:00am. I dont remember much about it. I didnt have time to be scared. Allhamdullilah everything went well. One of my nurses told me afterwards that the first thing I said when I came out of anesthesia was something about my football lineup (which let the record show - I had my fantasy lineup in working order for BOTH of my teams all things considered so all you bitch ass jerks who lied and used the excuse, "I didnt have time to change my lineup" after I beat your sorry carcass can shove it! lol)

So for the next two weeks I was on recovery vacation which was great because I got to hang out with my family and friends, got lots of neat cards and flowers. The best part was waking up to this small, warm, squirmy, energetic, vivacious boy everyday. How do you tell a little boy not to tackle his wounded Khala? I had a lot of people shower me with attention and affection. (Thanks Chris for helping me with my laundry)

Im so blessed to be alive and so blessed to be loved by so many. I love you all. mwahs!

OH! And the best gross factor part: I got to see my appendix and tissue slides when I went to work: Awesome.

SILENT HILL MOVIE

SAVE YOUR MONEY!

WHY I STILL HEART U2

I'm not afraid
Of anything in this world
There's nothing you can throw at me
That I haven't already heard
I'm just trynna' findA decent melody
A song that I can singIn my own company
I never thought you were a fool
But darling, look at you.
Ooh.You gotta stand up straight, carry your own weight
'Cause tears are going nowhere baby
You've got to get yourself together
You've got stuck in a moment
And now you can't get out of it
Don't say that later will be better
Now you're stuck in a moment
And you can't get out of itI will not forsake
The colors that you bring
The nights you filled with fireworks
They just left you with nothingI am still enchanted
By the light you brought to meI listen through your ears
Through your eyes I can see
You are such a foolTo worry like you do..
OhI know it's tough
And you can never get enough
Of what you don't really need now
My, oh my
You've got to get yourself together
You've got stuck in a moment
And you can't get out of it
Oh love, look at you now
You've got yourself stuck in a moment
And you can't get out of itI was unconscious, half asleep
The water is warm 'til you discover how deepI wasn't jumping, for me it was a fall
It's a long way down to nothing at all
You've got to get yourself together
You've got stuck in a moment
And you can't get out of it
Don't say that later will be better
Now you're stuck in a moment
And you can't get out of it
And if the night runs over
And if the day won't last
And if your way should falter
Along this stony pass

It's just a moment
This time will pass

Why I Heart Shakira

Who would have thought
That you could hurt me
The way you've done it?
So deliberate, so determined

And since you have been gone
I bite my nails for days and hours
And question my own questions on and on

So tell me now, tell me now
Why you're so far away
When I'm still so close

You don't even know the meaning of the words “I'm sorry”
You said you would love me until you die
And as far as I know you're still alive, baby
You don't even know the meaning of the words “I'm sorry”
I'm starting to believe it should be illegal to deceive a woman's heart

I tried so hard to be attentive
To all you wanted
Always supportive, always patient
What did I do wrong?
I'm wondering for days and hours
It's here, it isn't here where you belong

Anyhow, anyhow
I wish you both all the best
I hope you get along

But you don't even know the meaning of the words “I'm sorry”
You said you would love me until you die
And as far as I know you're still alive, baby
You don't even know the meaning of the words “I'm sorry”
I'm starting to believe it should be illegal to deceive a woman's heart

You don't even know the meaning of the words “I'm sorry”
You said you would love me until you die
And as far as I know you're still alive, baby
You don't even know the meaning of the words “I'm sorry”
I'm starting to believe it should be illegal to deceive a woman's heart

Open heart
Open heart
It should be illegal to deceive a woman's heart

Open heart
Open heart
It should be illegal to deceive a woman's heart

THE NEATEST LICENSE PLATE

LFE 786

Ma and I saw this on a car last night and Im tempted to ask my friend to run the plates to see if this is a Muslim person or if this is a coincidence.

I dont believe in coincidences, but its still a neat plate no matter what.

Dont Care for Chain Emails

(except for the one I text messaged everyone last night)

But this email was pretty interesting. Its about building a house to determine your personality. Apparently if you click on the link below you can build your house next to mine (I think thats how this works)

http://drawahouse.com/houses/list/

(My house is called 'The House' built by Farah.

For lazy bums, I've posted a pic of my house.

Here's what my house says about me:

You are sensitive and indecisive at times. You are good at making friends and when the joyful moment arrives, you make the most out of it. You are shy and reserved. If you've drawn a cross on each of windows, you always want to live alone. You are very tidy person. There's nothing wrong with that because you're pretty popular among friends. Your life is always full of changes. You will avoid being alone and seek the company of others whenever possible. You love excitement and create it wherever you go. You see the world as it is, not as you believe it should be. You added a flower into your drawing. The flower signifies that you long for love. It also safe to say that others don't see you as a flirt. You don't think much about yourself.

Indecisive? Ya think? Yeah Im still deciding.

The Importance of Istikhaara

Allah says in the Holy Qur'an: "And it is very possible that you dislike something whereas it is good for you; and (similarly) it is very possible that you like something whereas it is bad for you". (Baqarah 16)

From the above ayah, we learn that man has limited knowledge and deficient intellect. Therefore, many a times, he may desire something, which may prove harmful to him, and on the other hand, he may dislike something, while it is good for him. The sole possessor of perfect knowledge, and the only knower of the unseen is Allah, the Creator of man and the Controller of the system of the entire universe. Therefore if man desires good, he can only find it in the hands of Allah. According to one Hadith: "It is from the good fortune of man that he makes Istikharah (seeks good) from Allah, and it is from his misfortune that he discards Istikharah."

Read the rest of the article @ http://www.alinaam.org.za/library/istikhaara1.htm

The Truth About Wishing

BE CAREFUL WHAT YOU WISH FOR. IT WILL COME TRUE.

Decisions, decisions, decisions

Too much to think about. Id rather not think about it anymore at all. Not everything you get is meant to be right?

Psycho-technologists

Its not easy being a Cytotechnologist -- but Dr. D comes to the rescue!

Hi Dr. D!!!

MUST SEE VIDEO!!!!!!!!

I know we've all seen about a gazillion documentaries on 9/11. This one is different. Check it out. You'll be glad you did.


http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-8260059923762628848